Lord of the Flies, Chapter 9

A View to a Death
R.I.P. Simon, R.I.P.

I know I'm supposed to hate Jack's guts and everything, but I miss the taste of that tender yet thick meat. I hate myself for giving in to such a desire, but I am sick and tired of these freaking berries! There, I SAID IT! I would much rather eat Jack's pork than the littluns stupid berries! I could tell that Piggy thought the same thing. When I looked at Piggy, all I could see was this big, corpulent body gnawing on a piece of pork. At least Jack can't read my mind. I don't want to give him the satisfaction of knowing that I prefer meat (which he provides) instead of berries. I must admit, that pork sure was good.

I understand Jack still being angry at me for what I said about the hunters and him, but why did he let me eat some of the pig he caught? He let me eat his meat, but then he was sour towards me. Why not just tell me to go back to where I came from? I don't get it. Jack confuses me. One minute he is Mr. Hospitable, and the next he is Mr. Get-off-my-property! He has got to make up his mind. Am I a friend or a foe?

I can't believe they killed Simon. That was horrible. They just kept on beating and beating until they couldn't beat anymore. Man...that was just sick. I know that it was raining hard and they got way too caught up in their "game", but how the hell do you mistake a boy for a beast? MY GOD! THE BLASPHEMY OF THIS PREDICAMENT IS...IS...WELL JUST PLAIN RETARDED! Who in the world mistakes a freakin' talking boy for a ravenous beast? Apparently those dodo birds. Goodness. I feel so sorry for Simon. It's sad enough that he died, but the fact that he was beaten to death is unbearable. Thank goodness he died so quickly. It would have been horrible to watch the poor kid suffer. I sure do hope that he sees the phosphorescence of the lights of heaven. May his soul rest in peace.

Lord of the Flies, Chapter 8

Gift for the Darkness
Anarchy

That was a pretty heated argument between Ralph and Jack. Ralph shouldn't have insulted Jack's hunters. Now Jack is pissed off at Ralph, and decided to leave our tribe. Jack may be demoniac, but like it or not we need him. Jack organized the hunters for us. And he caught a pig for us so that we could eat meat. But now that he is gone, what the hell are we supposed to do? Jack organized hunting and who would be on fire watch. Maurice and Roger left with Jack, so that is three biguns that left. Simon is nowhere to be found, so that is four biguns gone. All the littluns do is cry and whine. And I know that Ralph does not want to deal with that crap right now.

Jack only called that stupid meeting, because he was hoping that everybody would take his side, but they most definitely did not. Jack was being a jerk about it too. He was talking about how everybody should vote him for chief because he was stupid school prefect and he could sing. Jack has no demure. All he does is brag. Jack really has to work on his people skills. I must admit though, that was pretty funny when nobody voted Jack as leader. I'm glad I did not start laughing. That would've been the end of me.

Saving...

Ever since Jack left, his name has been a taboo. Everybody just refers to Jack as "him", or "you know". What is kind of odd though, is that he just left today. I can tell you one thing. I sure as heck ain't gonna miss 'em! What was cool though, is that after he left, there was nobody pickin' on me. And because nobody interrupted me when I was speaking at the meeting, we now have another signal fire on the beach and don't have to risk our necks going up to where the beast is.

When Jack raided our camp and took some of our fire, he said that they caught a pig and were going to have a feast and that we were welcome to come. At first my mouth started to water, but then I pictured the poor, old paunched pig, cooking over a fire with those savages celebrating and jumping around it. It makes me sick to my stomach. Jack is just an animal. He never knows when to stop. And what's worse, is that now he has all of the littluns begging Ralph to let them go to the feast. Not only was Jack trying to get fire to cook the pig, but he's trying to get more followers. What is scary is that if he gets enough, the rest of us will be forced to join because we won't be able to take care of ourselves. I sure do hope that it does not come down to that.

Lord of the Flies, Chapter 7

Shadows and Tall Trees

Epileptic Dullness

I want these seizures to go away. It hurt my fingers today when I gripped the rock. Maybe I can try to avoid it, or maybe try to tell when it is about to start so I can move away from anything that may cause me harm during my seizures. When I was telling Ralph that he would make it back okay, I could tell I was confusing him with my arched back, strained neck, and choked mouth. He was probably wondering what I was doing that for, but I was actually having a seizure. Epilepsy sucks, because you could be talking to someone and out of nowhere you could start thrashing all over the place. The worst part is that everybody will stare at you, and not know what to do.

I think that Jack may hate Ralph, but his hate for him is only drawing them closer. When Jack was leading the hunt, everything was handy-dandy. But when Ralph said that he would lead us to the signal fire, Jack threw a poorly conceiled hissy fit. I can understand liking and wanting to be in charge, but you don't have to be the alpha dog in every single stinkin' situation. It is just not necessary. Jack needs to get his head together, and stop trying to bring back the bravado of his first kill.

Ralph used to look like a kid, but now he has an impervious gaze that never changes, and is a dun "bundle of joy". I myself liked him better when we first arrived on the island, because he was more fun and didn't have to try to understand the littluns, 'cause he already understood. His childlike behavior of playing rugger and laughing with everyone was replaced by some sort of windy zombie. It seems that everyone else has turned to their darker side, (especially Jack), except for Piggy and Ralph. Piggy hasn't changed a bit, but Ralph has. But I know that deep down, he is still that nutjob of a pre-teen; I just hope it can come back out after we are rescued.

Lord of the Flies, Chapter 6

Beast from Air

Rave On, Rave On

I am tired of all this beast nonsense. I used to think it was all gibberish, but when I saw Sam 'n Eric screaming and flailing about how they saw the beast, I had no doubt that the beast was real. Even though I now believe in the beast, that does not mean I am not tired of the beast. This interminable query of whether or not the beast is real has finally come to an end. No more, "I could have sworn I saw it", and "I thought I heard it behind me." Now that we are certain that the beast does live, we now know that we have to keep an eye out and periodically go beast-hunting. That I am looking forward to.

Ralph got a little bit too waxy about the whole beast thing. I know that he is just trying to look after everybody, but it is time for action, not strategy. And I swear, almost the first thing out of Ralph’s mouth had to do with the signal fire and how we have to make sure it is still going. Do you know how tired I am of that? “How’s the fire Jack; check on the fire Jack; why’d you let the fire out Jack?” I am on the verge of insanity. Sometimes I just want to strangle Ralph, and hold on ‘til he stops breathing. And of course fat, old Piggy has to stand up for Ralph, because Ralph is his “buddy”. I do way more than Piggy has done in his entire fat life, but Piggy is the one who gets the attention and sympathy. Does Jack get any? Of course not! ‘Cause the only things Jack has done is catch a stupid pig for all these losers and search the entire island so we will all feel “safe and sound”. I do all of this bloody work and get no credit, thanks, or congrats for it. All that I get is getting treated like the guano on these boulders. I would much rather take my choir and leave these pathetic girls instead of putting up with their crap, but I am too embroiled with what our plans are. And there is no way that I am going to let Ralph of all people, have all of the responsibility and power for himself.

I cannot wait until we find that beast. I just want to rip out its throat, and throw its head against the rocks. Before I start imagining my glorious victory, I should think about what I am going to do before, during, and after the battle between "good and evil". I am almost certain that Ralph thinks of me as evil, so he might confuse me with the monster. But at least I will end up being the winning man. I wish that we would hurry up and find this monster though, because just thinking about our encounter is making me giddy.

Lord of the Flies, Chapter 5

Beast from Water

Stepping Up

I'm losing control. And the the worst part...everybody knows it. Especially that jeering, dumb-butt Jack. I call a meeting at night for crying out loud, and it starts out well and then drastically goes downhill. Nobody respects me anymore. They think that not interrupting me at meetings is respect, but it is more than that. Respect is not crapping by the tents that we sleep in instead of by the rocks. Respect is not interrupting people when they have the conch. (mostly interrupting Piggy) Respect is not bullying and degrading someone. Respect is FOLLOWING THE RULES that we all made. Apparently, nobody cares about maintaining their sanity. All everybody cares about now is taking advantage of their freedom. Do you want to know what I say to that? It is ludicrous bollocks that we have no care for the rules, no matter how much they may help us survive.

Jack is going to get it. How dare he embarrass me in front of everybody. I am the leader not him, so he should just deal with that instead of tempestuously throwing a temper tantrum. He may be a strong and alert hunter, but regardless of that, he is a discursive, stupid, vain, lamenting baby! And I did not care for him saying that I favored Piggy. Who does Jack think he is! Leader? Nuh, uh. Heck to the no. He is a gangly teenager that is so self-conceited and arrogant, that he is almost completely unaware of the fact that nobody cared about him catching a stupid pig. Normally, I would have said "Good Job", but in the process of catching the pig, he went behind my back and let the fire out. Because of his stupidity, we were cost a ticket home. I was looking forward to seeing my family again, but Jack just had to crush all of our dreams and hopes. Jack needs to take a "chill pill". "Sadly", we're are not in England, so we can't just go to a "pharmacy". No thanks to stupid Jack.

After that row with Jack, I think maybe I should step down. The one person I wanted to respect me the most just spat in my face. I don't want to be leader if nobody is going to let me lead. Because then, what is the point of being a leader; you're not doing anything! But Piggy thinks that it would be stupid of me to step down, because then Jack could do whatever he wanted. Which includes beating the snot out of Piggy whenever he likes. When I think about the damage Jack could do to Piggy, it sends shivers down my spine. I will not let that happen. Not while I'm around.

Lord of the Flies, Chapter 4

Painted faces and Long Hair

Just Tired

Boy am I tired of everybody picking on me. Particularly Ralph and Jack. Either Ralph picks on me and Jack joins in, or Jack picks on me and Ralph just gives him a light "lecture". Either way, they still pinch my specs and push me down. Like when Jack let the fire out and took all of the hunters, just so then they could catch a stupid pig. When Ralph yelled at Jack, Jack could care less. But when I yelled at him, his belligerence took over and he malevolently stuck his fist into my gut. I don't see why I am the only one picked on! Well, some of the little kids are picked on, but that is just childplay. What is being done to me is bullying. And I am tired of it.


Besides having part of my daily agenda including being bullied, I like my life on the island. The littluns like me, and it's fun picking berries with them. I think the only friend I've made is Simon. When Jack was cooking the pig, he wouldn't give me any meat because I embarassed him by yelling at him in front of everyone. But Simon saw how hungry I was, and gave me his pork. I think that Jack blacklisted Simon for that, but Simon seemed as if he could care less. It takes a truly good soul to do something like that in spite of a person like Jack. I hope that he and I start to hang out, because I am getting tired of only having the option to hang out with the innocent, playful littluns or the idiotic jerks that are in my age group.

I sure was excited when Ralph spotted the ship. It was rather amusing watching all of the blatant boys blunder out of the forest and onto the beach. But almost as soon as I went into a daze, I snapped back out of it. I had to grip reality. What if the signal wasn't smoking? What if it wasn't and the ship wouldn't see any sign of humans on the island? I asked Ralph if the signal was lit, and of course he ignored me and absentmindedly said that of course it was lit. I could tell that he didn't take in what I was asking, so I said it louder. Still he said of course. At that point I was panicked. I screamed at him if the fire was lit and that we should check just in case. Finally, Ralph stopped daydreaming and got serious. I could tell that my tone of voice had panicked him. He screamed for everybody to run to the mountain where the signal was located. When I watched all of the other boys bolt for the woods, I saw the swarthiness of their skin burst into thin air and replaced by pale, shocked armor. Being in the physical shape I was, it took me awhile to catch up -to everybody. But when I arrived, all I could see was impalpable sorrow, anger, and despair. Sorrow, because we all thought we would never see our family again. Anger and hatred for the godforsaken hunters, who left the signal so they could catch meat. And last but not least, depair for we now all believed that we would die on this island. Either from starvation or old age, just the thought of death on this horrid island, shook our hearts. I will never forgive Jack for this. For abandoning our safety for his pride. For making my life on this island a living hell. For making me believe that I was nothing, and that everybody else meant nothing to him. I will never forgive him for that.

Lord of the Flies, Chapter 3

Huts on the Beach

Fire Aftermath

Ever since that fire, everybody has been scared because that kid with the birthmark on his face died. The little ones have the most nightmares about the "beastie" and the fire and I can hear the screaming and susurration at night. Some of the older boys have nightmares too, but their's are not as vibrant. Sometimes I feel sorry for them, but other times I am worried that the "beastie" is real. If it is real, it will make surviving a lot harder. And scarier.

Ralph was talking about how at our meetings everybody talks about building a submarine or an airplane, and all of these other vicissitudes. But when we start to build it, everybody only works for like five minutes before the compulsion takes over and they go play instead. When he said that, I thought that maybe we have been gone from society for so long, that going back is no longer a huge priority. To be honest, I like our freedom but I would rather be with my family and go to school than get sunburned, and scratch lice out of my hair. But I think I have done my part by standing at Ralph's side and helping him build the huts. So far we have three, but the third one needs some more work. At the fire, Piggy brought the lack of huts to our attention, and how it should be raining soon. I don't know about the other guys, but I won't want to sleep in the rain without any coverage.

Sometimes I get tired of Jack and Ralph's bickering. Ralph is trying to be a good leader by suggesting that maybe the "hunters" could take a break from not catching anything and help him and me with the huts because we are the only ones actually working, but of course, Jack has to have some smart remark about how he's a hunter and that he is supposed to catch meat. (though I doubt he will) It would be nice though to eat something else other than these wretched berries. But my back is peeling from my sunburn, and I would rather not have to deal with such labor any longer. If this amount of work keeps on being put upon me, I am going to be in bad shape.

Lord of the Flies, Chapter 2

Fire on the Mountain

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

At first, I didn't think that much of Ralph, but he's a pretty cool guy. When I first saw him, I just saw a gangly young boy who had no idea what he was in for, but he has gained my respect with his wisdom. I still don't like that I have to take orders from him, but he's not a bad leader. Today when everybody was panicking about the "snake beastie", Ralph did a good job raising everybody's spirits. I mean, him talking about how his dad has a ship, and somebody will find our island and rescue us, got me excited. But Ralph should still take those notices seriously, instead of joking around. What if there is a beastie, and we're all in danger? Ralph doesn't want to do anything about it, but I will make sure my choir searches high and low. We cannot risk the safety of the community.

I am so glad that Ralph thought of starting that bonfire to catch the attention of ships and planes, because I don't think any of us would have thought of that. But as soon as Ralph said "fire" almost all of us started capering and running up to the top of the mountain. I am sure that our ebullience upset Piggy. He's always trying to organize everything. Ralph is in charge, not stupid old Piggy. That kid really pushes my buttons. Always whining, never standing up for himself;it all just gets annoying and old. He is an officious fat boy that doesn't know the first thing about running a community.

At the fire, Piggy got heated up about the fact that Ralph didn't know how many kids were in our community. And then he got mad about Ralph pinching his specs so we could start the fire. He helped us! I don't see why he's complaining. I am so tired of all of this recrimination. Ralph says somethings, Piggy squeals in retaliation about some nonsense; it's all a pattern. I am sure that everybody else has grown old with this. But when Piggy was talking, he mentioned that nobody knew where all the little kids were, and that got me worried. As soon as the words left Piggy's mouth, the fire licked the pricklies, and the fire expanded. Then Piggy started asking about where the kid with the weird birthmark went, but in a for-example tone, and not so long after we found out that the kid died in the fire. If we wish to survive, I think there has to be some organization around here. Or else.

Lord of the Flies, Chapter 1

The Sound of the Shell
Leading Man

That Jack sure is a piece of work. All he does is try to control people, yet he shows no control for himself. Like with the pig. He could have easily just slaughtered the pig so we could eat, but no he didn't do anything. And instead of admitting that he was scared to take a life, he got defensive and acted as if he was just trying to figure out where to strike. Simon and I would have understood if he was uneasy about killing that pig, but he was too worried about protecting his ego.

I have to admit, being leader of everybody is pretty cool. Everybody listens to me, and I get to blow that cool conch thing. Jack was pretty angry when I won the "election". He is so used to being in charge or having an adult in power, that he forgot how to be a kid. His red hair, freckles, and blue eyes may make him look childish and gangly from afar, but up close he has a furrowed brow, deep creases on his forehead, and intense eyes that look as if they witnessed something horribly disturbing. Though Jack is upset that everyone preferred me as their leader, (except for Jack's "choir" who only voted for him because it was their duty), I believe that Jack is content with the fact that his choir was nominated the Hunters. This was a win win situation. Hopefully the Hunters will actually catch something instead of stiffening like Jack did. And not only did Jack stiffen, he went PALE! I just hope his Hunters will not do the same, otherwise we will all die.

I feel bad about telling everyone what Piggy was called. I thought it was funny, but when I saw the pain on his face when I was about to leave with Simon and Jack, I felt bad about what I did. Piggy had asked me not to tell anyone what other people used to call him, but I didn't take him seriously and now he is a laughing stalk in our joined community. When Simon, Jack, and I return I am going to start to be nicer to Piggy. I might have to talk to Jack too, because he's a control-freak/jerk. I did not like that Jack was calling Piggy Fatty. Hopefully he listens.